Jacksonville, NC

IMG_979772135940138The move to Jacksonville, NC was an expensive one, not just monetary, but also of personal values. Looking back on my impulsive and bad decisions, I feel as if everything that I’ve gained for myself in the last few years all went down the toilet.  It is a regrettable mistake, and one that I must now live with for the rest of my life — such a melancholy statement to make for almost the end of the year, especially when the beginning of the year started off well enough!

Only 2 weeks before getting married, I made the ill-thought decision to quit my job of six years, and then relocate to North Carolina.  I’ve always talked about leaving NYC, but never actually thought I would ever do it.  When I think of the City, I think of everything that it has, and how others dream their whole lives of coming to NYC instead of the other way around.  I had that horrible sunken feeling deep inside of me — you know, that feeling when you’ve bought a home or car, that buyer’s remorse feeling that people get.  So far, my time in North Carolina has been a purely miserable one, and I wish I knew how to turn back time.

The moving company that charged me the ridiculous price of $1,400 to move my relatively small belongings to NC — also stole my jewelry!

I wasn’t being realistic of my expectations.  I’ve come to realize that many other young military couples probably are enchanted with the idea of marriage and for the woman, especially the wedding, but the reality of it just plain sucks.

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Even more disheartening to me is that not only did the movers stole the jewelry that my mother gave me as a wedding present, but that I also lost all my other jewelry — some which was just irreplaceable.  Some of those jewelry weren’t just material things, some of them had personal value that could never be priced.

I guess this post was written for me to vent, but also coming to terms with certain sentiments that are gone forever. (Those were just the jewelry items, I have a whole other list of personal items that are basically gone down the toilet as well — but why remember every single misery that I’ve lived through?)

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